I hate this.
I want to get better.
The Psalms are filled with lament, grief, acceptance, and praise.
Here’s my own Psalm for this week (+a couple pictures from this year’s adventures!)
I hate this;
I want to get better.
Climb mountains with my children
Camp in forest glens
Dance upon cracked desert
Dive in crashing waves
I hate this;
I want to get better.
I’m a fly, observing everyone’s condition
I’m immobile, a despicable deposition
I’m always ill–pain wasn’t the dream
I’m eternally exhausted, not my ideal
I hate this;
I want to get better.
Fill me with compassion for the hurting
Grant me the favor to still find Wondering
Empty me of my impossible agenda
Deepen my empathy for the chronically ill
I hate this
I want to get better.
Sustain me through the suffering:
Pain is not mine alone;
It belongs to our groaning world
That too, longs to be healed
I hate this;
I want to get better.
While I am here, let me still rejoice!
While poured out, Ancient Power come alive!
When I feel, I’ll be secured by comfort
When I am still, I will be filled
I hate this;
I want to get better.
Heal me, O God, and I will be healed!
Save me, O, God, and I will be saved!
I can curse You–and curse the Universe!
But that brings no comfort
That will not empower me
Heal me, O God, and I will be healed!
Save me, O, God, and I will be saved!
For You hear my lament and praise
Yes, I hate this;
I want to get better
But I meditate on good, given to me
Embrace the present season,
Here I am free
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